Old Bulletins

Old bulletin board
Mar. 24th, 2016
Brushing with the Occult
Well, just another visit to the many oddities of the league. These squid fellows look squishy but almost as elusive as the elves. The Weres really shone this game, rip'n and a tear'n through the competition. First drive, Rabbid tore through a unsuspecting linemen and sent him to the afterlife. It was a full team effort crushing squidies, as KO's were in abundance. But it wasn't all one sided, early on Al got hurt on the opening drive and one of the zombies tripped and took himself out trying to get in position for the foul. Still, we had the numbers advantage most of the game.

We put the pressure on all first half but they still slipped through the defence with mere seconds and scored. Luckily, our last chance on the line for the half we put the hurt to them.

In the second half, we had to deal with even number but we quickly divided the opposition. Scoring halfway through the second half, we hoped to score a second TD. We would not be disappointed, as the the cultists had plenty of holes in the the D with only 8 players. Rabbid got a quick jump on the offence, racing down the field in a pre-emptive blitz, locking down the ball. The rest of the team, swarming the squidies, cutting down on any blocking opportunities. But of course, the slimy bastards grabbed the ball and tried for a quick score, bombing the ball down the field but the ball would end up out of bounds and a lucky throw in by the crowd would land it on the LoS.

Run Da'Ba would pick it up, and quick pass it off to Rip for the TD. Up 2 TD, we felt this one would be in the books with almost not time left.

Once again, the Badmen gave away the advantage near the end of the game. We put the hurt on the line but would overlook the oppositions chance to score. Strong Bo would be holding onto the ball with little defence around him. An unlikely block would see him on the ground and one pass later, we have a tie game.

An unused bribe and lazy wizard sitting on the bench would be salt in the wound for this one. Next outing, we'll have to amp up the team and get out there, we are still not living up to the billing of Badmen.
- Cleon Salmon
Mar. 22nd, 2016
Misty Mountain Menace
Today was a tough loss to take. The Biggar Badmen were bested by the short, smelly, bearded players from Misty Mountain.

We had the opening kick off, it started off promising when the front line adjusted, ready for the coming clash. But quickly turned into every undead fighting for his afterlife. Those tough little mountain brats don't go down easy and they sure don't stay down when we were able to put them on the ground. Hit after hit, ending in something of a small breather for the dwarves before they would get to their feet and beat down the zombies.

Zombie after zombie, knocked around or knocked out. Poor little mindless drones cowering in the box, unable to find the strength to get back to their feet.

We tried fouling, but the armour was too think. The Were's, our secret weapon, but even the had a hard time getting through the metal shells of those wobbling pylons. The little persistant pests kept laying the hurt and stumbling clumsily to our end zone. The fans could not be won over, except for a late kill by one of the wights. Apothecary could not save that one, death as it were was fated. But even that triumph dwarfed by Crabtree's game finishing TD that saw him become a legend in our time.

We head back to the drawing board on this one. Not having the man power all game really hurt this time. Unreliable zombies, an opponent that could do no wrong. We'll welcome our new addition and maybe he can bolster the other zombies lifeless spirits.
- Cleon Salmon
Mar. 17th, 2016
Raising up the Badmen
Another meeting with them elf creatures at Badmen's home turf. Since our last meeting almost a month ago Tauriel's Elves have become more seasoned, but the Badmen meet the challenge.

For this game, we raised another zombie.. literally. Welcome Carl, the one eyed zombie, ready to take punishment and eat brains.

A perfect day in Badmen stadium saw the Were's try and recover the ball for the drive, which ended miserably. Them elves don't waste anytime getting over to our side of the field and take advantage. An early mistake really put the pressure on, but Captain Rip Jaw McLeod can always be counted on to kick it up a knock and tear across the field in a frenzy that ends in scream of terror. The zombies and fleshies would eventually lend support and Ol' Rip would score first blood.

Before the half, the elves would lose the ball shortly after kickoff, even after catching the zombies flatfooted.. really hard to stop the Rabbid Radditz, who would score a TD of his own in the final moments of the half. Regardless, the fans decided after the drive to storm the pitch and enact their frustrations/excitement, taking down a few elf players along with a couple Badmen. Anything to get them involved I guess.

An early touchdown scored by the elves in the second half. Unable to stop the quick push after some brilliant coaching on both sides, goes to show how adept the elves are at passing and moving the ball.

With the game at 2-1 for the Badmen, it was time to lock down the ball and cage up. A couple late hits and knockout ensured a numbers advantage and the were's were able to protect the ball and deter the other team.

Unfortunately, we forked out the money for a bribe the zombies would not have unfair play this game. We'll have to have a talk with Kevin about getting those dead beats in the game. There have been hushed rumours of a zombie union brewing after the latest tagging initiative, hopefully we can quell this uprising and get them playing dirty soon.
- Cleon Salmon
Mar. 15th, 2016
Calamity at Chaos Stadium
The Biggar Badmen had a good game today at the Brawler's Stadium. This stadium doesn't have the largest turnout of fans but man are they scary spectators.

At opening kickoff, it all looked like a good day for some blood bowl. But right after the ball hit the ground, a rock hit one of the Chaos players and it all spiralled from here. Not only did a rock stun one of their players in the first half, but it happened again in the second half. We ended up holding their drive up in that first half, lots of pushing and shoving and maybe that is where the fans felt they needed to help the game along.

In the second half, the Badmen received the ball. And while the Weres were tracking down the ball, the fans took to the field and levelled the Brawlers. Never have I seen such a thing and this definitely helped out as we couldn't keep the zombies out of the box. The lazy lot of them stood up to the hits from the Chaos Warriors and that other raging beast on the field, but after a few hits they wouldn't get back off the bench.

We got in a couple touch downs but after the first one, low and behold, another rock flies at the Chaos team and the shenanigans continue.

We look forward to playing the Brawlers again, but maybe the should invest in some bars to keep the fans off the pitch
- Cleon Salmon
Feb. 14th, 2016
The Elven Passing Threat
We had our second encounter of the pointy eared kind. How many races of elf are there? These ones seemed to go down more easily, but they sure can move. On numerous occasions they dodge away from the zombies and lets face it, reaction time is sloooowww.

We got the opening drive, weres tracked down the ball and made the run forward. Elves were persistent though. They dodged into the most unlikely spaces, cage crashing, reckless and effective. They stopped our drive and threw the ball across the field for a touchdown. The first half was a wash, with few casualties and a single foul.

On another note, the zombies have started to teach each other how to foul... so that's a thing, good for them to have hobbies.

Last half had a better showing of the undead. Casualties, weres scoring tounchdowns, zombies acting like pylons. We my be back on track now but we still got a ways to go.
- Cleon Salmon
Feb. 14th, 2016
Well, we met with the underworld teams this week. A motley crew of rats, goblins and even a troll.. this one didn't end so well. Those skaven fellers can really move, run circles around these zombies and fleshies.

Tone of the game didn't start to well. These undead barely have a chance to clue in on the fact the game started when the Skabbers blitz into our zone and but the pressure on early. A TD was shortly to follow and it wasn't the only one. Seemed like the team couldn't hold onto the ball for very long. Those Skabber mutants and all sorts of weird appendages going on, seemed well equip for most situations. I'm currently working on a program to sew extra limbs and such to they zombies to see if we can work something out but all they do is weigh them down more.

For now we'll have to take our licks but we'll come back with a better showing. I hear them ghouls are quite the agile creatures... we'll have to see if we can dig a couple of them up.
- Cleon Salmon
Jan. 28th, 2016
New addition
What's better than one Werewolf with Block?

That's right, two werewolves and one has block. The Biggar Badmen have signed Rabbid Radditz to help out the team. The boys are slow, so this added help will keep this machine ripping and a tearing well into the late season.

Next game is against them Nurgle folk.. a stenchy bunch for sure. This may be an uphill battle on a count of they got a lot of strong players but I'm cooking up a something to level the playing field.
- Cleon Salmon
Jan. 28th, 2016
Kevin Where Art Thou?
Our game against the Elves was a tough one. We thought our experience with the little people would in part prepare us for the equally elusive pointy eared menaces but these undead boneheads aren't that quick to catch on.

I was hopeful on the opening drive when we got the ball away from them, that we could capitalize but they are fast to close the gap and lets face it, zombies don't sprint. We did catch a break when one of them mercenary fellers tripped just before the end zone and ol' Rip ran back to recover it but the elves closed fast and dropped him.

We got a possession in the first half but when the Wight went to lend support to Rip, the damned bone head tripped over his... bones. I tell ya, them elves don't mess around when the passing game is involved, they grabbed that thing and tossed it out of danger before a zombie could moan. So after the first half we are down two. At the very least our star player not wielding a chainsaw is making his presence known.. haha.

Hear comes the question... who left the locker room exit open?? Zombies without a baby sitter tend to wander into strange places and I don't know where Kevin is but I do know he walked out of the locker room and nobody has seen him since. I spoke with our sponsors and I'm currently raising some funds to have these simpletons tagged or at the very least collared. If you've seen Kevin, send him back home... the other morons miss him.

Second half.. there was a lot of smack down laid out. Them point eared fellers may be fast and hard to hit, but when you get a hit in with a big guy, that tends to lay them out. KO's galore and we even wounded one of them. We may not have their shiny armour but my boys don't feel pain... actually not sure if they feel anything... can't really ask them either. But we were able to thin the herd and of course Rip ran one back to get the game closer but its still a loss.

Kevin when I find you, I'm chaining you to one of the fleshies.
- Cleon Salmon
Jan. 28th, 2016
Little People and Chainsaws
Well, we made it through the first game of the season with only one mishap. To start, Rip was able to get the first TD without destroying the ball on the way to the opponents end zone, can never trust them Weres. But, in the second half them little people were able to jump on the trees which propelled the little suckers over our defenders and into our end. Crafty little bunch.

Our star player, Hack Enslash was doing quite well all game. Up against them trees, that chainsaw has a lot of umph but he couldn't seem to catch those smurfs with it. It was still a good game for him, 1 kill, 1 other casualty... and 1 more kill... himself. Yup, that's right, apparently if you play with the saw eventually you get the chain.. so for ol' Hack.. he got slashed in two. And no chance to regenerate or help from the APO could help that guy. R.I.P. champ.

In the last moments of the game, one of the wights was able to run the ball in for the win. Still, it seems them little people gave just as well as they took from us. Guess its time to round up all the zombies in the trailer and get the rest in the bus. Haha.. zombies, so unreliable but somehow still Bob gets the MVP, might have to toss them one of them dead smurf things as a treat for the ride home.
- Cleon Salmon
Biggar Badmen
Race:  Necromantic
Coach:  Skip Wolfbane

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